Argos United 0 FTDs 7

Argos Unted went into this game desperately seeking to halt their club record losing streak and notch their first goal of the season in this weeks game against the Flippin Tall Downies (FTDs.)

United made changes to their team with Wobinho, Markinho and Joeninho coming in for Matty, James and Matimus who was suffering with something or other or nuffin.

Unsurprisingly FTDs dictated play from the off and after having 2-3 efforts already failing to notch, one of them added their first in fortunate circumstances. After saving the initial effort, Wobinho could only push the effort on goal straight back to the same player who was left with the easy task of slotting into an unguarded net.

United then suffered a major setback in their plans as striker Watmeister went off in sickening circumstances. After chasing down a loose ball he pulled up sharply, clutching his groin. With many anxious faces looking on, United called upon their physio Tunno who after giving it a thorough rub down, it was deemed that he couldn't carry on and was taken away in the air ambulance. Early indications show it is only a sore leg and has been prescribed a plaster and some ribena. Matimus coming on to replace him.

FTDs went on to score a few more before half time as they attacked at will with movement far superior to anything United could muster.

The second half bought much of the same as the pattern of the game continued.

However Untied were able to create a couple of half chances with Adam twice coming close having a shot blocked and the goalkeeper producing a save at his near post.

Half way through the second half FTDs had another easy chance, gifted to them by Wobinho. After collecting a shot through he rolled the ball inexplicably straight to an FTD forward who blasted the ball at goal only to be denied by Wobinho, who dislocated a thumb in the process. The injury forcing a reshuffle as Adam replaced Wobinho in goal, I dread to think waht impact this injury will have on his COD abilities.

As the game drew to a close FTDs continued to attack however United soon had their clearest chance to date. After good work by recent signing Joeninho on the left, the ball broke to Markinho in acres of space who after picking his spot, saw his shot saved by the annoying moron in the FTDs goal.

United will now look to reflect on yet another defeat as they regroup, and go again next Wednesday at the Hawkinbury Beach Stadium.

Team: Wobinho, Markinho, Joeninho, Mikey, Adam, Watmeister (Matimus)

Attendance: 1 (T-Man)

Man Of The Match: Markinho

Argos United 0 TN2 5

Argos United came out strong on a cold Wednesday evening for what they hoped might be some much needed points.

Despite a much more threatening side this week, with chances throughout the game, Argos United continued their losing streak, which now breaks the clubs record for most losses in succession.

Argos United were hampered earlier in the week, with the news that their first and reserve team keepers, Wobinho and Markinho would be eloping on a romantic break during the week, leaving a deficit of players. This unfortunate news was worsened when Jarrett was called up for international duties, leaving Manager/Captain/Player M. Atkins desperately trying to find a team to field.

With both experienced keepers unavailable, and only youth team keeper Mattinho in the squad, Argos United applied to the FA for an emergency loan, which was granted, and signed in Adam Good for an indefinite period.

Fielding a team that included several newcomers, United would be forgiven for being a bit shaky to start with, however they showed an instant pressure and aggression on TN2, most obviously from the two new defenders, Matty ‘Bigfoot’ Trudel and James ‘The Yank’ Boden.

Despite the physical presence on the back line, United were overrun by TN2, with balls being repeatedly crossed side to side, taking apart the defence, and allowing a multitude of shots.

With new signing Good warming up on pitch, it was down to novice Mattinho to keep the ball out of the net in the first half, doing very well and only letting one in.
United had a fair few chances at getting forward, with a number of shots and long through balls which were an obvious weakness of TN2.

Both Atkins brother got chances in front of goal, most notably M.Atkins who after out skilling one defender, was elbowed in the face by the last man, causing possible Retinal Dysfunction. Unfortunately, due to the Ref not wanting to move from the shelter, the vicious challenge was not spotted during the passage of play.
Early reports indicate that United are asking for analysis of video footage by the FA to catch the challenge and deal with the player accordingly.

As has been United’s weakness so far, second-half fatigue set in, which gave the TN2s a chance to steal a confortable win, finally hitting the back of the net 5 times in total.

A disappointing outcome to a much anticipated game, Manager M.Atkins will be working the team twice as hard on Monday training to push for a much needed win.

Team: Mikey, Watty, Good, Mattinho, Trudel, Boden

Subs: Scott

Attendance: 1 (T-Man)

Next Game: Argos United vs. FTD’s (12/05/2010)

Argos United 0 Blue Waffles 3

Argos United made their debut in the soccer sixes league looking to get off to a winning start, however the game was to end in disappointment as Blue Waffles came out 3.0 winners.

United went into the game with 4 players carrying minor injuries. Mattinho was suffering with mild concussion after falling over his arse and into a wall, Jackinho also with concussion after having the ball smacked at him by a team-mate.
Wobinho after falling over and cutting his hand on an acorn and Mikey who suffers from being left footed.

The game started at a fierce pace with Waffles controlling the ball for long periods and United looking to break on the counter. The first chance of the game fell to Waffles but United keeper Wobinho was equal to the shot which may have just been heading over, however, it was too close to leave.
The game continued with united feeding off of scraps of possession and it wasn’t long before we were to witness possibly the save of the season. After another fluent attacking move Waffles created the first really good opportunity of the match however Wobinho pulled off a fantastic fingertip save to tip the shot on to the post and off to safety.

Half-time came with United lucky to have gone in level at 0.0.

The second half continued in much the same vein, however a half time sub for waffles gave them much more speed and numbers in the attacking third.

It wasn’t long before the deadlock was broken as some bloke called Brown nicked in ahead of the advancing Wobinho to bury one in the far corner.

2 minutes later and the Brown bloke scored again with an excellent finish into the top corner, a goal that bought about a change of keeper for United with Markinho replacing Wobinho.

With United’s lack of match practice starting to show, the game became increasingly one-sided with the only touch forward Watinho getting was when he touched himself.

Waffles begun to have more space to work in and started having pot shots at goal and in truth the score could have been a lot higher had it not been for replacement keeper Markinho in the United goal. After making 2-3 good stops he was finally beaten by another fine finish from Potato Waffle to make it 3.0.

As the game drew to a close, the United players were left breathing heavier than a paedophile at a primary school, thankful that Waffles only triumphed by 3 goals.

Team: Wobinho, Jackinho, Markinho, Mikey, Mattinho, Wattinho.

Attendance: 1 (T-Man)

Next Game: Argos United vs. Sherwood Pikeys (5/5/2010)